Building my own spirituality

   
     Last year, I wrote a post about how it was difficult to find spiritual direction or structure once you become detached from a particular religion. I still find this to be a true thing nearly a year later yet I think I have begun to find my way out of the darkness a bit (or I am simply enjoying the darkness, however you want to look at). Yet, there is much that has helped me through this process.

    One of the things that has helped me is just giving myself the freedom to explore all the different spiritual ideas out there, as many of you know. I've slowly given myself permission to investigate and entertain all the things I felt I wasn't allowed to look in years past. I often can't make up my mind about the veracity of said things but the beauty of it is I don't feel I really have to either. I'm simply exploring and being in awe of what I find. And it is always really interesting to not only see where spiritual paradigms differ but also where they overlap. The overlap reaffirms my theory that all spiritual paradigms are really just attempting to describe and relate to the same thing ultimately. I went from thinking there was no more ground left to cover spirituality to feeling like there is too much ground to cover than I will ever get around to. I'm actually to the point now where I have more books I want to read and more rituals I want to experiment with than I do time to dedicate, which can be frustrating but also exciting at the same time.

   Exploring all these various perspectives gives me the materials to build something of my own. Rather than passively accepting a ridged structure of spiritual beliefs and rituals, I have the chance to really create my own structure. After all, why the hell not? Who is to say those who constructed the spiritual structures before me necessarily knew any better than I do? Who is to say they had divine blueprints  to construct what they did?

    Perhaps this method just resonates with me so well simply because I have always been creative by nature; I've never been content with just appreciating the art. I've always had to eventually make my own art, and now, my own "religion".  Interestingly, I've encountered more and more people that seem to be doing something similar. My feeling is this is not merely some crazy idea of mine, or a trend but a movement into the future in relation to how humanity comes to view spirituality and eventually, science and spirituality as tools describing the same phenomena. 

    Maybe the thing that has helped me most of all is realizing that the spiritual journey paradoxically starts and ends right here and now. The thought that we are ever far away from the Divine, or salvation or enlightenment is simply that--a thought and that thought can be released. Those things are all right here. Of course, there are various ways to open yourself up to that inner paradise (prayer, meditation, etc.) and explore the mystery of it all but it is always within us at the center of our being. Fear is really the only thing blocking that realization.

    There is so much we can learn about and incorporate into our practice but ultimately I feel the spiritual journey is just about realizing that you already have the peace and fulfillment you seek, if you only accept it as so.